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Assertiveness is a way to communicate feelings, thoughts, opinions and beliefs in a respectful, clear and honest manner. Although it doesn’t come naturally to all, assertiveness is a skill that can (and should!) be taught to children – this will enable them to stand up for themselves and build resilience.
Assertiveness builds up their confidence, self-esteem, and ability to form and maintain stronger relationships.
Aggressive? Assertive? What’s the difference?
Aggressive behaviour can sometimes be confused with assertive behaviour because both communication styles involve people speaking up for themselves and feeling in control. However, there is a big difference between how you state your needs in each style. Assertive communication is direct but not offensive. In fact, part of being assertive is respecting others’ feelings and opinions, being able to take criticism in a constructive way, and being willing to negotiate when having a disagreement.
Therefore, assertive children are more likely to be able to:
identify their own feelings;
speak up for themselves and others;
avoid and respond to bullying;
disagree respectfully;
negotiate with others;
say “no” without feeling guilty;
build up stronger relationships;
build confidence and self-esteem; and,
feel in control.
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